How Avengers 4 will end

By Luis Arturo Noria

SPOILERS.

SPOILERS.

SPOILERS.

MASSIVE SPOILERS.

Avengers 4 ends with a “minority” of fans getting angry at the Russo brothers when their fan theories are not fulfilled in the final movie.

A post credits scene shows an angry fan creating an account at Rotten Tomatoes and giving a low rating score to the movie while speaking (apparently to himself) “Do the Avengers think that Thanos was their greatest foe? I’ll show them pain and suffering beyond this dimension. Their greatest battle has just begun, and they are doomed to lose…”

The end.

I know how the story ends because it happened before, with The Last Jedi, in an almost identical way. How many fan theories were out there that told the story of Rey, Snoke, Finn, Luke, etc.? Countless theories written before December 2017; all those theories that told their past, their future, from the best theory of all: Darth Jar Jar, to some of the worse, such as Mace Windu=Snoke, Finn=Lando son, etc.

What happened to those theories? Scrapped (and now there are a lot less for The Rise of Skywalker). What we got instead? The worst Star Wars movie. The quality of the movie is independent of the fan theories, and if you shut those angry fans, you’ll still hear that The Last Jedi is a bad movie. The angry fans only say those things because they felt their story was better than what Rian Johnson wrote. And for some theories, that’s true. Honestly, they were not helping themselves, they could have shut those fans if they’d written a good story, but they wrote a stupid story, so, how to defend them?

I don’t know what the Russos are thinking right now, but they should be nervous, at least they should be seeking for advice in Rian Johnson on how to handle “manbabies”, how to mistreat fans and how to convince yourself that you’re an awesome, special snowflake. The Russos are far, far, far, far, far better writers than Rian, I have faith that A4 will be good, but not for everyone.

Every day, a new theory for A4 comes out, and every day, more and more fans start writing their story in their heads, believing that their story is good. When the official story comes out, “a minority” of those fans who wrote their theories will be angry at the writers, the directors, the actors, and everyone involved.

Obviously, the media needs to say that those angry fans are just a “minority”, it needs to sell movies in the best light possible. Hell, even A Wrinkle in Time received mild criticism from news although it was poorly received by critics and audiences alike (the movie sucks, period). The media will say that the movie is awesome. It will most certainly be, I’m sure about it, but I’ll create such a storm that it would be like saying that a  F5 tornado is just a desk fan.

Who is to blame? The fans, sadly. I can understand the need to imagine, it’s natural, it’s human, but I don’t understand the need to try to change what you can’t change. Only a handful of people wrote and reviewed the story, and we are not one of them, so we don’t get to decide anything. If we can’t decide, why try to push our theory further? Why bother googling the obviously confidential mail of the Russos to send them a fan theory that they wouldn’t read anyway because they finished the final story months ago?

It’s not wrong to write fan theories, it’s wrong to think for a second that you have a chance that a small portion of your theory will make it to the final product.

Probably A4 will have a low user rating score, it would be like: -20 points because Strange didn’t die, -10 points because Captain America didn’t save Bucky, -5 points because Gamora returned, -30 points because in the post credits scene, we didn’t get the Fantastic Four or the X-Men.

I’m not threatening, I’m preparing. Mark my words: a storm is coming.

With Star Wars, what went wrong was that fans are too passionate, most of them grew up with Star Wars, but didn’t grow up beyond Star Wars. «Grown ups» still declaring that Star Wars is their religion, obsessively buying merchandise (films, toys, t-shirts, cosplays, etc., maybe spending 6,000 dollars a year), having an empty life, or a life revolving around the Jedi code. Look at what happened after 2015, and it’s still happening.

Is Marvel different? Fans are too passionate, most of them grew up with Marvel, but didn’t grow up beyond Marvel. «Grown ups» fantasizing about building an Iron Man suit (it’s impossible), obsessively buying merchandise (films, toys, t-shirts, cosplays, etc., maybe spending 6,000 dollars a year), having an empty life, or a life revolving around the MCU. Everything has been OK, until now.

What we will learn in May is which franchise has a more passionate fanbase: Star Wars or Marvel. If we were to snap them both, like Thanos did, ComicCon and other conventions would be left almost empty. Those franchises live because of their fans. Which franchise will get more upset when their fan theories aren’t fulfilled? Which actor or actress will close their Instagram or Twitter because of the harassment?

I only have one issue with A4 and it’s Captain Marvel, she may become a Deus Ex Machina, like Superman in Justice League, after all, she is Marvel’s Superman.

A4 will be a good film with a good story, but it’ll be hard to speak about it without someone complaining that it didn’t fulfill a fan theory. The difference with The Last Jedi is that this will be a far better movie, so it’ll be easier to recognize those angry fans, «manbabies», as the Manbaby No. 1 likes to call them.

What to say to those angry fans? Write a comic. There are dozens of universes in Marvel: Earth 616, the now defunct Ultimate Universe, the Cancerverse, the What-If comics, the X character kills the Marvel Universe, write a comic where the story goes according to you. You would not be damaging the franchise, you would be expanding it (and helping Marvel raise their comic book sales).

That’s the advantage Marvel has over Star Wars: it’s not a unique story, they’re endless stories waiting to be told, most are bad, some are good, all valid.

Thanks to the fan theories, Star Wars is now divided and many fans (including me) have left the franchise, we are on time to avert a similar crisis on Marvel. Don’t get too attached to your theory, please.

I just want to remind you the wise words that warned us about The Last Jedi, we didn’t listen then, please listen now:

This is not going to go the way you think.

– Luke Skywalker, teat milker